May 26, 2010

Check out Citizen Matters, Bangalore: Cyclists on treasure hunt, raise eye donation awareness

Check out Citizen Matters, Bangalore: Cyclists on treasure hunt, raise eye donation awareness

May 23, 2010

The Human Sexes (Part One) - Different But Equal

This is the first of a series of documentaries by famous British zoologist and ethologist, also known as a surrealist  painter and popular author.

These documentaries contain certain scenes of nudity, hence viewer discretion is advised.

May 19, 2010

Yay for Feminists?!


When innocence becomes the Prey..

Picture this gruesome scene;
A beautiful young girl not older than 10 years, is lured by candy and free ice cream, by a 'nice uncle' so that he can have sex with her.
Having gone through a similar experience I can tell you that she would be confused at what is happening, bewildered at the way the nice uncle is removing her clothes without asking her and shocked at the physical and emotional pain of the act. No matter how long or what really happened after that, that young girl or boy is scarred for life.

He or she will harbor unreasonable fear of intimacy in relationships and would most probably pass the fear and phobia to their children..
All it took for the years of trauma was that one person in the child's life who took advantage of innocence.

Our newspapers are filled with daily instances of rapists.
They feign 'chest pain' after they 'surrender'.
Now, if you ask me, they need to feel the pain of the my swift kick right below the belt. Human rights and gull shit, I would have wanted him put behind bars and castrated in the most medieval ways. But thanks to how things run in India, where even News channels run on TRPs, where which Actress got slapped by which director gets more media coverage than real issues of the society, where news is sensationalized by corny montages of still images repeated in a loop, it is anybody's guess why an issue like this does not even get its 15 minutes of murmur.

As long as we have men and women living together in a society that chooses to sweep issues with sex under the carpet. Or possibly it is because incest and rape among family members is so common in the Indian society that a news like this would embarrass us and shame our own conduct.
I have known several friends whose relatives and friends who have raped or molested them, but the victims are too frightened to talk about it or against them, since their families would never believe them in the first place. My Mom didn't believe me when I told her that 'a man hurt me down and touched me down' and probably would never. The perpetrators will go Scott free living a completely guilt free life. Some of them get caught but a large majority will live the social high life.

Shakespeare once wrote 'The Child is the father of Man'

This saying resonates in so many levels with so much poignancy.
Rape and all kinds of sexual crime against children and women must be condemned more than other crimes. Capital punishment is so easy on the victims. Castration sounds like a good plan, but that's just my personal yet brutal opinion.

Why would an adult prey upon a child and rob him/her of their childhood memories?
How do we deter future predators from ruining innocence while still upholding human rights?

Deciding the quantum of punishments for rapists is a thin line, that must be thread carefully.
Making sure that our laws don't encourage future predators is as important as punishing that rapist now.
Setting an example that will deter and defuse the urge to commit the crime should be decided on case by case.

The judiciary must get beneath the skin of the predator and deliver judgments that will be exemplary and just while making sure they don't follow a template.
Most predators that I know, do the deed because they know for sure that they will get away with blue murder.
The legal system is so predictable that we breed corrupt politicians and smug offenders, and all the while, they know that they can live a charmed public life that is not tainted with shame.

Some Asian and Middle eastern countries follow the system of publicly caning the offender, castrating and a fairly long term jail term and statistics have proven that this has deterred future offenders while still making sure justice is served.

Everyone has a right to dignified living and the person who irreparably damages another life, forfeits his/her right to live a dignified life themselves.

But all said and done, the human race is perhaps the only species that loves voyeurism and enjoys playing the moral high horse while delivering punishment and pain.
There is really no 'cure' or remedy for sexual offenders.
Castrated dogs, in an experiment, continued to mate with bitches even if they didn't have a testes.
Castrating offenders does not mean they will never ever commit another offense, but a rather crude way of avenging than a effective means of deterrent.

In our collective conscience of whats right and what wrong, we often end up punishing innocent drug mules who get caught carrying ridiculously small amounts of a banned drug with death sentences while letting ruthless rapists go through a life sentence that in most countries are just 12 years!
What gets my goat is that we think drug trafficking is more heinous than raping a child or a woman!
A swift yet air tight judiciary that will execute its rapists in public is the only way we can deter and reduce the soaring number of rapes and sexual crimes in our country

But what ails our judiciary is the same reason why rapes are difficult to prove when we don't have documented evidence. Rapes are just one person's word against another, but what might work would be to sentence them to rigorous imprisonment for the rest of their natural life, unless proved otherwise.

We will forever debate the kind of punishment that rapists and sexual offenders deserve, because that is what we love doing the most: Playing God.

The prosecution rests its case...

May 13, 2010

Dial 'G' for God

Do you have days that you feel like you are the victim and that God is snoozing and not doing His job?
Have you failed and thought that all is over?
Have you had a broken marriage or a torn relationship?
Do you have a wounded heart?
I am sure all of us have would nod our heads at atleast one of the above.

I've failed many times in the past. I've failed at exams, at work and at relationships. I've contemplated suicide exactly 2 times but could never take that final step. Somebody up there really loves me.
I've heard someone say that you are immortal until your purpose on earth is not served.
So if you would like to live for ever and ever, go ahead, don't answer your calling. Don't live the life you deserve to be living, Don't be what you are supposed to be.

But for the rest of us and the many followers of the the Bible, as it is written in the book of Philippians 2: 14-16, 'Do everything without complaining or arguing, so that you may become blameless and pure, children of God without fault in a crooked and depraved generation, in which you shine like stars in the universe as you hold out the word of life—in order that I may boast on the day of Christ that I did not run or labor for nothing.'

We are precious, so precious that Jesus, the Son of God, Himself died for our sins, my sins, your sins and your children's and their children's and their children's sins.
When He died on the Cross, His body was the sacrifice that paid for all sins that every human, that was alive or is yet to come. He paid for all the sins that you and me and all the people who ever lived on this planet would ever commit. How wonderful and AWESOME is God!
BUT, there is a condition. 

Oh yeah, We need to surrender ourselves totally and completely to Him.
Normally, we come across conditions that have strings attached but this?
Yes, He wants us. God wants us to love Him and trust Him completely and let Him be the Guiding Force in your life. Oh yes, we wants to do all the work for us!
As if letting His Son die for our sins and the sins of all humanity was not enough, He wants to make sure that we all get to meet His one and only Son.
I can almost picture Him gushing with joy when we let Him take control of our lives (which by the way, He created)

I remember the feeling of absolute joy when I let God take control of my life.
I and my ex had just finished our first and only counseling session and I for the first time, stopped rebelling and gave away the reins of my life to God. The sensation that
swept across my soul is indescribable. It was the most peaceful moment that I'd ever experienced.
The nearest that I can come to describing what I felt can be like how in a bitter freezing winter night, and you wrap a warm wool quilt over yourself instantly warming yourself or like that long deep breath of air that you exhale after holding your breath for long.

There is so many things that we can want to do, but there is so little you actually NEED to do. All you need to do is SURRENDER yourself completely and unconditionally.
Why are we so determined to struggle when the blessed life is so easy to get? All we need to do is listen to the still soft voice of our Lord.

He is all we need..
He is all for us....

He is knocking...
Will you not answer today?

May 12, 2010

Mums' the word

Two days after the planet celebrated 'Mother's Day', DNA had a headline that made me throw up: 'Woman sells 12 year old daughter to pay off debts'.
Besides the initial feelings of disgust what rushed to my mind was this could be an Indian woman. In-sensitized to the almost daily flood of female infanticide and sexual assaults, Indian readers are emotionally anesthetized to headlines like this.

What shocked me was the news report
It described in detail, how the Australian mother sold her 12 year old daughter to over 100 men so that she could pay off her home loan and buy two luxury cars.
The law took its course and unlike in India where a case like this would have been sensationalized with masala mixed 'stories' will probably give the Mother, a life sentence.
What surprises me is the meticulous and completely heartless planning that went into this.

When the 41 year old mother decided to prostitute her daughter, what was she thinking?
Better sense and all that defines a woman had to take a backseat when she went on to rent a hotel room and bought 2 packs of condom and set the price of a 'session'.

She obviously isn't the first one and will definitely not be the last human that will shock and outrage our public consciousness. We will continue to have fathers who will rape and father their daughter's own children and mothers who will use their daughters and sons for economic and sexual gains.

Our world, a tiny pixel in the vast unexplored expanse of Universe, is home to amazing contrasts.
While we have such glowing examples of self sacrifice and unconditional love and emotional bonding, we also have monsters like this unnamed Mom.

Behind all the headlines, I would love to know how the mother justified her actions.
After the 'sale' was over, I am curious to know what the mother did when the daughter was 'back'?
What did the mother think when she bought the luxury cars for herself?
I wonder what the victim is going through?
What did the 12 year old girl think when she was being systematically raped for over 2 weeks? And worse still, that girl will live with devastating diseases she had no way to prevent.
What will she think about Mothers on Mother's Day?

In Proverbs 31, we see God's definition of a virtuous woman. Obviously, our mother here is an epic fail when it comes to virtue.
How could a parent who is supposed to be the guardians of their children, turn into Monsters that cannibalize on their children's lives.

I have had wonderful parents but have known a dear friend of mine whose mom allowed her husband to rape her.
What became of her is she turned out into this shell of a woman who lost all confidence in herself, became obsessed about getting approval on anything she did, could not hold down a job and struggled with trichotillomania.

We are not born monsters, but we loose sight of our divine goal.
It is said Man is the only creature on earth that can worry. With parents like these, is there any wonder why we don't enjoy eternal peace.

Greed begets Evil.
Or is it the other way around?
Either way, the real issue here is how an entire lifetime of a girl who probably didnt even know how human reproduction worked, has been damaged irreparably.

I have been a strong believer that chastity and virtue are 2 things that we have all the right to choose.
We might be living in poverty but we can still hold on to our chastity as our greatest treasure.

Prostitution, being the oldest profession in world has its greatest advocates and critics, but no logic any critic could conjure could defend a parent who allow their children's bodies to be used lecherous men or themselves.

As for this particular mother, she will probably spent the rest of her natural life behind bars and far away from the home and the cars that she paid for.
But we still fail to set a deterrent to future predators.
An oxymoron in itself, monster mothers and lecherous dads must be socially ostracized in the fullest extent.

Families should be the last place a child should feel threatened and insecure.
Its not about today, but about their tomorrows and the days after.

When will we be wake up from being politically right and just cut the crap?

Happy Mother's Day!

May 6, 2010

Writing the Block

Bang!! Writers Block.

Most of my readers ask me why I write on human emotions and relationships so often.
Made me sit and wonder why most of my posts are almost like an Alanis Morissette song.

Well, to each their own.
What matters in my life are the many relationships that I have shared with different kinds of people.
I have had the pleasure of knowing people who were angels on earth as well as the bitter after taste of being friends with pure evil.

Relationships matter to me. As much as a career would matter to some people.

I have actually spent a fortune on people that I loved. But I cannot live without love.
People that know me through the many years cannot hate me. I may have made the worst mistakes of my life (More than 3 mistakes!!) but my inner circle of friends and soul mates have stuck by me through the pits and crescendos of my life.
Its become so easy to sift out the chaff that all I really need to do is to wait for a couple of years and if that person sticks with me, then I would know that he/she is a keeper for life.

The last 8 years of my life have a rollercoaster of ugly relationships and happy moments. However, through all this, like the proverbial silver lining, I have come through all pretty much unscathed and a lot more wiser.

"But why rant about it??"

Well, because we are all love crazed fools waiting to get addicted. And like all addicts, we foolishly think that we are strong enough to "give up anytime we want".
Yeah right!

If all the love ballads and the Agony Aunt columns are any indication, humans will never realise that falling in love is fraught with danger. You think about it... That's it. You are gone!
Drama Queens, heart aches, jealous tantrums and 'If you love me, you will do this for me's is what you will need to brace yourself for.

So, when you say you are in a relationship, that is like admitting that you have the granade with the pin glued precariously to your thumb. One wrong move and you are misery.

I happen to experience almost first hand what happens when men become the Drama Queen.
A dear friend of mine had what I thought was the most deserving guy, but after months of dating and much love invested, she (my friend) realised that he was the human equivalent of a rodent bastard. It took a restraining order to keep him away.

We fail in love and being nice. The good ones are married and the bad ones are available. They come in those neat tetra packs with the flashy colors and great promise of healthy, happy life.

So while my latest writer's block sucked me dry, I had to sit still and bid my time.

But I am Back.
Almost with a thud. No. Not a thud, maybe a splash. A nice splash.

Relax folks.. Go easy. There's more of me to go around.

May 4, 2010

Dont try this at home

Please don’t commit these hideous Facebook crimes. If you are currently guilty, stop now before the whole world becomes aware of your apparent lack of Facebook etiquette.
Remember, these aren’t mere suggestions, they are warnings. Stop now or be judged later by the Facebook Gods – they are fierce, unforgiving and may sentence you to eternity on MYSPACE!!!
Facebook Don’t:

1. Couples, DON’T put cutesy “No, I love you more!” posts on each other’s walls. ESPECIALLY when you live together. It screams desperate and just makes others jealous…like me. Cuz I can’t even get my boyfriend to put ‘In a Relationship’ on his profile. But I’m totally fine with it. I mean we’ve only been dating 7 years so it’s like totally NOT a big deal. Okay, moving on…

2. Don’t send notices out for ALL CAUSES. Be selective. Pick and choose. If you are already a part of the cause to stop animal cruelty, stop crimes against children, eat vegetarian and adopt a fugly person to date – that’s enough. Stop there. If you’re for all the causes – you’re really for none of the causes and everyone will nickname you FAKEY McFakerson with a capital F!

3. Learn how to flip your pics. Nothing says “I’m a total internet granny” like posting pics that are sideways or upside down. Seriously, you can do it. There is a flipping option under the pic after you upload it.  It’s just plain unfair because we all know that everyone looks hotter sideways and/or upside down. Show us your TRUE SELF~

4. TMI! There is a such thing as TOO MUCH INFORMATION. Your Facebook friends don’t need to know about your last bowel movement, what it looked like, smelled like or what it took to create it.

5. Depressing status updates. Quit bumming us out with depressing status updates where you say “my life sucks” or “this is the worst day EVER” or “I’ll be dead by the morning.” Seriously! At first I liked this because it made me feel better about my life, but after seeing people post these depressors daily – Facebook friends no longer want to empathize with you. Instead, they want you to start lying. Facebook is not your therapist or BFF. It’s time to face the reality that some of your friends got stuck befriending you in hopes that this would deter you from stabbing them one day.

6. OVERLY HAPPY STATUS UPDATES WITH TOO MANY EXCLAMATION POINTS THAT ARE IN ALL CAPS!!!!! Okay, so you may think you have the best husband, boyfriend,wife, mistress, kid, cat, or disease EVER, but guess what, you don’t and no one agrees with you. Our selfish minds won’t let us because all we think when you proclaim your “bests” is  - “Ours are better!”

7. Excessive status updates about how much good stuff you do like volunteer, work out, eat
vegetables and feed the elderly.  GOOD FOR YOU! Now keep that stuff to yourself, FACEBRAGGER!

8. Taking more than 2 quizzes a day is UNACCEPTABLE. Get a life! Not like I have one, but I know others that do have a life and it doesn’t involve finding out what Hoggwarts character you are and when you are going to get married. It’s just nonsense, especially when guess what, you are already married!

9. If you receive event invitations the WORST reply is ‘Maybe.’ This is okay if you really are on the fence and plan on making up your mind and posting yes or no before the event. However, always being the ‘Maybe’ person doesn’t go unnoticed and infuriates the Facebook Gods. You don’t want your FaceRights taken away from you now, do you?

10. If you beat my Farkle score, under no circumstance is it okay for you to post your win to my wall. Since I play Farkle obsessivelyoften, I already know. Braggers don’t make for good FB friends and sometimes Farkle just feels bad for people and gives them a really high score, which coincidently puts them ahead of me on the scoreboard. So it’s not about talent or good luck, it’s just about pity, but not when it happens to me.
Now get a sense of humor and follow these tips AND you will have the best social networking life EVER!

Passing the Poop

What is the deal with email forwards?
I receive like 500 email forwards a day. Each forward seems to be as lame as the next. Why do people waste their time sending this stuff? If it’s supposed to be entertaining, guess what? It’s not! The themes of these forwards are always highly offensive and often times just plain scary.
Common themes of email forwards include:
Forwards including pictures of cuddly newborn animals with a giant sign that reads: I LOVE YOU or YOU’RE MY BEST FRIEND. These forwards are pointless and insincere since they are also sent to 97 of your other “best friends.” How special am I supposed to feel when I’m included in a giant list from your Hotmail contacts (some of whom I know you don’t even like)? The bottom line is that If you were really my friend and wanted to show me that you care, you wouldn’t send me a mass forward. Instead you would give me money, call me, inquire about my life, braid my hair or maybe read one of my blogs.
Forwards including an imperfect mixture of Christian/Patriotic sentiments about the importance of prayer in public schools, the destruction of brown-skinned people, how life begins at the make-out session and/or how God will save me if I join your cult church. When I get these forwards all I can think is – do you even know me? And, it may be time to add your email address to my BLOCKED list. No thanks Jim Jones. I’m not drinking your Flavor-Aid no matter how many crazy forwards you send me.
Forwards including some type of “funny” joke about race, size, and economic status. Were you wearing a large white hood over your head when you sent this? Is that why you were unable to read the “joke” that you just sent me?  You’re definitely no Chris Rock, but you could pass for Strom Thurmond. And you may right now be thinking – who the eff is Strom Thurmond? And you know why you’re thinking that? Because you spend too much time sending these dumb forwards! I blame Jeff Foxworthy and Larry the Cable Guy for your lapse in comedic judgement. Forget you might be a redneck because you are a racist! And please DON’T get’ er done!
Forwards including chain letters. These may be the worst thing ever invented. At the end of each of these forwards it usually reads: PLEASE FORWARD THIS TO AT LEAST 1, 568 PEOPLE IN THE NEXT 2 SECONDS OR YOUR DOG WILL BE DROWNED IN A BLOOD-FILLED BATHTUB BY ATHEIST VAMPIRES WHO ARE VOTING FOR BARACK OBAMA! Are you serious!?! I never waste my time forwarding this crap because chain letters are just another way of filling our time with useless tasks that keep us enslaved to ignorance and repetition. In the time it took you to send that forward to all of your friends, you could have done something worthwhile like brush an old person’s hair; dust off your Precious Moments figurines; and/or finish the crossword puzzle in your latest issue of Soap Opera Digest. I mean where are you priorities people!?!
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