Thursday, October 18, 2012

The Better Evil [293/365]

On the other side of the planet, Obama is battling like a war-worn veteran against Mitt Romney. Sure, he came out of the first debate looking like a lame duck and many fondly remembered the most previous lame duck Prez that the US had. Going into the first of three debates, Romney had little to loose and much to gain. He was after all down in almost all the battleground States and trailing behind in the rest. O was perhaps being too complacent. He looked like a weary soldier who forgot his boot camp training.

O arrived with his wife and children in tow looked every bit suave as any other day. Its a pity they won't allow the family pooch too or it would have been a family circus. Four years and I am beginning to hate how American presidents like to parade their families. If we did that here, I am sure we'd have Ekta Kapoor choreographing.

Closer home, we have the BJP and Congress readying themselves for Battle Royale. They've got the money ready, now they'll need to start distributing much of that to bribe us and the league of incredible businessmen so that they can get to power and recover all that money back. Patriotism is still number 1 which is why BJP today said they will seal our borders if they are elected back to power. They also illustrated the colorful example of how Israel is able to protect themselves even when surrounded by enemies. And I thought WOW! Such rhethoric sure sells with hot-blooded unemployed youth who are made to believe illegal immigrants working in your city is the reason they are not getting jobs. I'd hate to burst the bubble, chaps. But the reason why you aren't getting a job is because:

  • You don't know how to attend an interview wearing proper formal attire. And no, Jeans and full sleaved shirt tucked in and sandals is NOT proper formal attire.
  • Your graduation/diploma is not your passport to success. Your communication and interpersonal skills are.
  • You don't know how to frame and speak a grammatically correct English sentence. 'As you know my name is ...' is not acceptable introductory statement when asked to describe yourself.
  • You do not realize that when coming for an interview, you need to shave and for women- remove unwanted hair on your body. I've seen far too many male candidates who come with a 3 day old beard and bleary eyes and women who come in frumpy clothes and dirty slippers.
  • Two words: Breath-mints. Please.
So now why would we want to close our borders? Isn't that like shutting yourselves within your homes just because there are a few stray dogs outside? Gosh! Our neighbors are mad at us because we are like the big brother who loves to visit their homes when it is dinner time, stay until dessert, listen to the juicy gossip and then leave abruptly when they needed our advice or help. We have had really embarrassing instances where we have not come to the aid of our neighbors when they were in crisis- like Srilanka, Nepal and Bangladesh. If Pakistan is nipping at our tails, it is only because we have cornered them. If China is uncomfortably close to our neighbors, it is only because we allowed them to. What we really need is not arms and a squadrons of armed forces and barbed wire on our borders, but bridges. We need to get our neighbors on our side and they are not too fussy too. We still have a chance of being what we are supposed to be. Imagine how powerful we could be if we had Pakistan, China, Srilanka, Nepal, Burma and Bangladesh on our side? Forget the G8, the G20 and the BRIC, together we could monopolize over 98% of every manufactured product, 70% of the world's outsourced jobs, over 70% of the world's English-speaking graduate and post-graduate workforce and be the world's biggest consumer and king. I may not have the statistics but I definitely think if our politicians knew how entrepreneurial Israelis are, they would realize that we don't deserve to even be in the same field as them. With absolutely no natural resource of their own but a large barren piece of land, they now grow everything and manufacture every necessity themselves. They have the most intelligent scientists and the most influential policy makers in the planet. The Superpowers know better than to antagonize the Jews and they have won every single war they've fought. Which is more than what we can claim.

Hundreds of years ago, the British ruled over us. And the simplest rule in their book was to keep us divided and poor. With the way they ruled, I think that rule worked quite brilliantly. As they left, they made sure they estranged our twin and cut off our thumbs so that we would never ever unite and grow together. Our politicians have done the rest. Today, we have sewer-scum like Thackeray and Didi who are both certified nut-jobs and the best part is they think they are being patriotic and right. Unfortunately they don't see how powerful they could get if our country united with our neighbors and how they could have a shot at global policy-making just the way the US Prez has.

Call me an evergreen optimist having a good day but I definitely think we could use some bonding because we have let the nasty after-stink of the British stay for too long and its time we cleaned up our act.

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