Oct 3, 2012

The greener grass [277/365]

If there is one thing in common that we share with our western neighbor, it is our love for beautiful women.
Many years ago, they asked for Madhuri Dixit in exchange for J&K. We said 'No Way, Jose'.
Then we asked for Dawood Ibrahim. 'Take a hike' we were told.
The score was tied.
And then few months ago, we let them have Sania and they let us have Veena Malik. The Paki's thought they struck gold. Or bronze. We made them believe that we were loosing our national asset (no pun intended). But the joke was on them. Sania has actually never won any tournaments worth mentioning on her own, so we didn't really mind the barter.
By the time they realised they had a lemon in their hands, it was too late. Veena had already flashed her cleavage and won legions of Indian male fans. Sania flashed some of her thunder thighs in consolation. Goods once sold cannot be exchanged.  

Ha Ha!

Politically however, the game was tilted in their favor.
We have our uncouth Mamata Di and size 22 Amma and they had the luscious Hina Rabanni. Damn

We drooled uncontrollably every time Hina clicked her Jimmy Choos or adjusted her Gucci clutch during her maiden Indian visit.
She ramp-walked her way into our hearts and open arms. Suddenly many Indians regretted not having closer ties with Pakistan. We all swooned in unison.
A successful businesswoman, economist and capable diplomat Hina makes being a foreign minister look effortless and stylish. Secretly we all wished if we could swap our Mayawati and Didi for a Hina. We were in love.

So when rumors of Hina in love with Benazir's son broke out, Indian men everywhere gasped. We lapped up stories of her romance with Bilawal Bhutto Zardari. The cards and the secret meetings were stuff of Bollywood movies. She was the most (and probably the only) beautiful Pakistani politician and he was the handsome prince. She was both rich and successful and he the sole heir of Benazir's unaccounted loot. They plan to retire from politics and settle down in Switzerland, which would make sense since it would be closer to the banks where her late mother-in-law stashed her billions. I think that is a pretty sound plan for the future.

Her current husband is still in denial. As a matter of fact, someone should tell him that this is a process.
Her future father-in-law is furious. No surprise there!

So does this mean we will probably never get to see our beautiful Hina again? Actually, no. Seeing how wonderfully talented European paparazzo are in taking photographs of nude celebs, we should be seeing a lot more of Hina and in about 15 years, she will be back in Pakistan fighting elections. 


The moral of the story: There will be everlasting peace in the subcontinent if all Pakistani politicians would be women as hot as Hina and Veena.
In the meanwhile, we hear more Pakistanis are buying OralB toothbrushes now.
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