Showing posts with label MInisters MMS Masala. Show all posts
Showing posts with label MInisters MMS Masala. Show all posts

Thursday, March 22, 2012

Litany of Shame [81/365]

In Christian hymns, there is a section in every hymn where a chorus is repeated.
The headlines today was a chorus of public shame.

Barely two months after a couple of BJP politicians were caught indulging in some forbidden pleasures, it looks like some in its party didn't get the memo to stop titillating themselves while in session. Legislators in the Gujarati Assembly were caught ogling at some eye candy on their iPads. (Read the enchanting story here)
No lessons learned there, obviously.

The CAG has estimated that the national exchequer lost about 10.7 lakh crore by not following standard and fair procedures while auctioning coal blocks between 2004 and 2009. So this officially becomes the largest scandal in Independent India. That's right, kids. 2G is no ji. (Path breaking news here)
No lessons learned there, either.

The government flip flops on gay rights. Again.
Cant teach them a lesson.

The chief minister of the southern Indian state of Karnataka delivers a populist budget.
Cigarettes and liquor prices have gone up. Diesel has become cheaper. Sports got the kick in the butt. And the city will become world class in one year (*yawn). Taxes have gone up on cabs and taxis and property is now cheaper. In short, DVS has waved his magic wand and spread his largesse to every one he could think of. With an eye on the elections, this is just what the people expected their elected representative would do.
And oh yes, our ministers get new iPads too. So this means they can now itouch their iporn too.

Amen!


Wednesday, February 08, 2012

Holier than thou [38/365]

The land of Kamasutra has done it again.
For all those foreigners who thought Indians are prudish and not 'curious', a bunch of legislators from the southern state of Karnataka have managed to prove them otherwise.
Three ministers were caught by a television crew watching a porn clip on their smartphones. The reason for the outrage is because they were watching the clip while the house was in motion discussing other 'serious' stuff on Tuesday. (Read the enchanting story here)
Fast forward a day, all three got the boot, a committee was formed, and the opposition got another brownie point. While the entire nation drools over the finer points, politicians from Kerala will barely want to mumble considering their penchant with prostitution. So its business as usual in India.

Politicians getting caught with the pants down, and hands inside the cookie jar (no pun intended) has always made for interesting media. 'Porn'gate, as any scam worth its muck gets christened, couldn't have come at a worse time for the ruling party in the government. As Indians prepare to go to the polls, a scandal like this is something that any politician could have stayed away from.

While heads are rolled with incredible efficiency, I also begin to question how effective such decisions are.
C'mon, are we going to assume that these politicians are never going to watch porn again? Are we to believe that they will be reformed and never ever pornicate themselves? That's right. They are not going to stop.
Infact, they will only be a lot more careful about not getting caught.
Not that I am advocating that watching porn is bad. Infact, I am yet to think about a person, man or woman who has not watched porn, ever.
I'd rather recommend a healthy dose of erotica to any man or woman but as Indians, we are naive. We'd like to believe that people have never watched a 'blue film' ever. Aw crap! We'd like to believe that our boys and men have never masturbated ever. Most believe that woman don't like porn. Well, my ex was into 'animal sex' and there are tons of sites that cater to every possible sexual craving capable to humanity. And Internet was just the most incredible way to all that free porn. Heck, this will even boost the numbers of those googling out the now aptly titled 'ministers mms masala' clip online.
We are indeed closet pornstars. Behind closed doors in cyber cafes and seedy hotel rooms, our boys and girls are satisfying themselves to their heart's content. And we have the MMS clips and video clips to prove that.

So whether it is a video of a rave party going wild or men gang-banging a drunk woman, the takers are always there. Its just a matter where you watch it. The ministers made the cardinal mistake of letting their curiosity get the better of them. Like a bunch of repressed teens with raging hormones, they forgot that the walls indeed have eyes. Caught red handed with a blue film (pun intended). However, I know of many many colleagues who have either watched porn at office or have atleast exchanged porn via emails while in office. I also know of some colleagues have made love in restrooms and dimly light landscaped lawns. But I guess we are all innocent until caught.

I doubt if this would be the last porngate to hit the headlines.
In the words of Michael Moore: I wonder how future civilizations will judge us...


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