Showing posts with label Movies. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Movies. Show all posts

Sunday, May 31, 2015

San Andreas | The Corny Movie Review by Navin

Ok so we've all seen this like a gazillion times before. Everything from malicious aliens and zombies to the end of world disasters happen in the US. 
Introducing San Andreas. 

Starts with Ray (Dwayne 'The Rock' Johnson), a rescue copter pilot, in the midst of a cliff-hanger (no pun intended). Ofcourse like most of other movies of the same genre, Ray is one half of a divorced couple and a doting father. 
And predictably, his estranged wife is already with another guy who abandons the step-daughter in trouble. 
Meanwhile, a team of seismologist discover it is time for a mega-quake which will rearrange the West Coast. 

San Andreas doesn't tell you anything that Volcano and 2012 doesn't. This movie probably reinforces the belief that Americans living in America are probably the most afflicted people in the world. 
The theatrics and the scale of destruction is truly astounding. Unrealistic but still astounding. 

Where San Andreas shines is in it's actors. Chiefly Dwayne does a really good job and is really coming of age with San Andreas. Contrary to his previous outings, where he mostly grunts, and flex his over-sized bicep 3 times too many, here he shows emotions without looking contrived. 

Though the movie is filled with disaster/apocalyptic movie cliches, it is always good to see actors try something new, so watch this movie if you are sucker for movies like this and Dwayne Johnson. 

My Rating: 4

What does the ratings mean? 
0-4  : Not worth your presence in the same zip code as the TV/Theater.
5-7  : Err... the movie is pretty, but it's definitely missing something. A storyline, that is.
8-10: 'Drop-the-dishes, stop-the-sex, jaw-dropping, that-is-incredible' 2 hours of movie experience

Friday, May 22, 2015

Mad Max: Fury Road | The Corny Movie Review by Navin

Mad Max : Fury Road

Hollywood is blessed with the best technology money and imagination can buy and movies like Mad Max are children of this gift. 

Apocalyptic films are always tricky. They can get it right and are revered or they go wrong and are reviled. 
Mad Max is a grand spectacle of theatre. There are tons of high-adrenaline vehicular warfare and gore. 

Yes, water will be precious in the future and wars will be waged for the bare necessities of life. But how do you explain women in sheer clothing? 
Mad Max doesn't make sense for most of the movie. Charlize Theron is good, so is Tom Hardy. 
There is a simmering hatred between the two characters and sometimes it gets annoying. 
The pimped up cars and trucks appear like they mated cars  from the Fast and the Furious with Adams family. 
Mad Max is daring and packs a punch. 

If you like to see monster truck derby with pimped up gargoyle-looking cars being driven by equally goofy characters, then Mad Max is the movie to watch.
For me, Mad Max was a sheer waste of good money.

My Rating: 5

What does the ratings mean? 
0-4  : Not worth your presence in the same zip code as the TV/Theater.
5-7  : Err... the movie is pretty, but it's definitely missing something. A storyline, that is.
8-10: 'Drop-the-dishes, stop-the-sex, jaw-dropping, that-is-incredible' 2 hours of movie experience

Friday, April 24, 2015

Avengers - Age of Ultron | The Corny Movie Review by Navin

Starting with Avengers, I'll be reviewing several of the movies that I've watched this year.. 

Avengers: Age of Ultron

Making sequels that can beat the success of its predecessors are a mighty task.
You are burdened with the need to achieve higher and do better. 
Avengers: The Age of Ultron, in many ways gives you your ticket's worth. There is the usual VFX wizardry that Marvel movies have now come to be famous for. 

Tons of action that will make Iron Man, Thor, Captain America and Hulk fans happy. There are new demi-Gods and superheros but a wafer-thin storyline. 
Joss Whedon shines in parts. He manages to even squeeze in a meatier role for Romanoff and Banner. 
There is simply too much carnage and concrete mayhem. For 2 hours too long. 
I felt visually exhausted 45 minutes into the movie and I am pretty sure I had to stifle a yawn sometime after that. 

Should they create a Part 3?  There are no strings on me..

My Rating: 5.5

What does the ratings mean? 
0-4  : Not worth your presence in the same zip code as the TV/Theater.
5-7  : Err... the movie is pretty, but it's definitely missing something. A storyline, that is.
8-10: 'Drop-the-dishes, stop-the-sex, jaw-dropping, that-is-incredible' 2 hours of movie experience.

Tuesday, April 03, 2012

Review: Titanic 3D: Still 'King of the world' [93/365]

100 years ago, the Titanic sunk like a certain Shah Rukh movie.
90 years later, James Cameroon make a ton of money by making the biggest blockbuster at the turn of the last century.
Today, he is preparing to sell old wine in new bottle.

But honestly, does the Titanic really get any more grandiose in 3D than it was in 2D?
Presumably, the scenes at the climax where the ship breaks in half have been left unchanged but much of the remaining part of the movie has been made a cinematic notch higher. After all, one of the greatest love stories of the last century has to be experienced in a theater rather than at home. Titanic 2D was never meant to be screened in your VCR or even your home theater, and so is Titanic 3D.
While Titanic 3D is surely every bit as real as you can get minus the hole in the pocket and the disaster, I am not sure if I'll want to film makers redoing their greatest epics in 3D. James Cameroon could have made an entirely new movie out of the money he spent in redoing the Titanic, but if the movie does (and most probably will) get the cash registers ringing, then he's hit the jackpot.

But why stop at 3D? Where viewers will be able to feel and smell everything that actors in the movie does in a 4D, you could soon have that sinking feeling.

So, can we really review a movie as good as the Titanic? Supposedly no.
An epic as fine as this is something you definitely need to see, even if it isn't for the 'now' mediocre acting of Leo or Kate. Even if you already know how the movie ends, and even if you know how basic some of the special effects now seem. Titanic 3D is surely one movie that you must watch in a theater.

Happy Viewing, everybody.

My Rating: 8

What does the ratings mean?
0-4  : Not worth your presence in the same zip code as the TV/Theatre.
5-7  : Err... the movie is pretty, but it's definitely missing something. A storyline, that is.
8-10: 'Drop-the-dishes, stop-the-sex, jaw-dropping, that-is-incredible' 2 hours of movie experience

Tuesday, February 28, 2012

..And the Oscar goes to [58/365]

The Academy Awards, also fondly known as the Oscars: An annual event where Hollywood actors come together and pretend to enjoy and toast each-other for the wonderful work that they have created in the year that just went by.

You know the Oscars are round the corner when every English movie channel worth its movies suddenly start serenading the 'greatest' movies of all time. Time to bring out those over used movie reels for Saving Private Ryan, Forest Gump, Titanic and the other predictable. Roll out some contests and promise some freebies to keep the viewers interested until last week of February. You know the drill.
So while the movie industry is busy lobbying for the golden statuette that will help them hike their 'fees' if they win, even the nominees get their moment of fame.

Now, everyone loves recognition. We'd love to be recognized for our work and rewarded too. But as today's stars walk the plush red carpet in their crisp Armanis and the Christian Diors, I wonder if this is really all there is.
I am quite sure there wouldn't be too many people who would recognize the stars that walked the red carpet even 40 years ago. But I am very sure we'd recognize Einstein or Pascal or Da Vinci any day.
True, movies are not meant to be a contribution to humanity in the same way Science or the Arts is, so I'll let this argument pass.

Amid the fist bumps and the heart wrenching minutes leading up to opening of the envelope, I wonder how much of the show is scripted and how much is truly rewarding performances.

And the Oscar goes to...

Nonetheless, I'll still root for the climax in Naked Gun 33 1/2 as my all time favorite Oscar moment.
"And they thought I couldn't do drama"

Thursday, October 27, 2011

Review: G.ONE to the D.OGS

Now, I love movies. May not be a movie buff and I won't care to know who is the sound technician or the art director of a movie, but I certainly enjoy movies. I am quite opiniated when it comes to reviewing movies and I am mostly right when it comes to judging movies. Touche`

So, what kind of movies do I watch? 
Well, all movies are fair game. 

So starting this week, I'll review one movie that I watched.
Michael Jackson in neon?!

And this week, it's Ra.One at the slaughter house.

You must be either dead or buried alive to have missed all the hype and paid excitement about the most expensive bollywood movie to date -
Now, this is going to be really nasty but I must admit I was once a strong Shah Rukh Khan (simply known as SRK) fan. But those were the good ol days, when we would see him only in good movies and less advertisements.
And then the good king of la-la land decided he was not been seen enough.

Fast forward a few years and now it is impossible to miss an advt that has his grimacing face or his famous stutter in a normal human day.
While I cannot help but applaud how he has realized his dream of being the face of every possible product/service that can be sold in India, why must we be subject to his Utopia?

So what if he has minus one fan to his billions, SRK is proud to be the arrogant, sore loser and indifferent bollywood star who is on hire for dancing and hosting your next wedding party.

Ra.One, his magnum opus was hyped so much that I'd expected the movie to bomb pretty badly. And I hate it when my predictions come true.
His incredibly well lubricated PR machine made sure that all you saw on any channel was an advt about Ra.One. But alas, not all the money in the world can really make up for awful visual effects, cold as dead fish storyline or actors who parade through the movie like many zombies on prozac. The movie lacks any of the pizazz of an Hollywood flick and is at best choppy and a snooze fest. Thank god for the air-conditioned multiplexes.
Surely, Ra.One will be able to get all its costs back in a few days, if it hasn't already. But would I recommend that you watch it? I don't think so.
Although the movie does have some big names, the entire plot looks contrived and very kitschy. Too many songs? Definitely.
If you are fan of any of the big stars in the movie, you will be disappointed at the pace the movie goes through. Pained even.
If you are big fan of special effects, sorry, there isn't much in here for you either. Surely, this movie does show that FX in Indian cinema is coming of age, but to a generation that has been breast fed on Star Wars and Superman movies, some of the FX scenes in this movies are painful to swallow.
As I finished the movie, I could not decide which I felt stronger. Violated or relieved. 
Violated, because of the visual and emotional mess that I had to endure.
Relieved, because I could finally put all the hype behind me and start a new life tomorrow.

My Rating: 4

What does the ratings mean?
0-4  : Not worth your presence in the same zip code as the TV/Theatre.
5-7  : Err... the movie is pretty, but it's definitely missing something. A storyline, that is.
8-10: 'Drop-the-dishes, stop-the-sex, jaw-dropping, that-is-incredible' 2 hours of movie experience

Thursday, November 04, 2010

Dishum Dishum

Quintessentially, fights in movies are nothing new and most Indian movies need atleast one 'stunt' scene.
Fight scenes usually play to the masculine need to show power and while most Hollywood movies deliver their fisticuffs very convincingly, almost all Indian movies are a departure from all logic and laws of physics.

What amuses me the most is when I see a fight sequence in a Malayalam movie from yore.
Any keralite worth his coconut will know Jayan, a Movie star of yore. With his unique style of acting and speech I would call him the Marlon Brando of Mollywood.
And in many movies from the late 80's and through the 90's, the hero would inevitably make a mash potato of the villain(s) single handedly. Not that I think the Hero should not have done that, or that I am sympathetic towards the villain. But what got me is how the director would think we would believe in a fight when inspite of much bashing up, the dhoti (lungi) of the hero or the shirt of the villain does not tear or come undone!
C'mon! I avoid situations where I have to wear a lungi/mundu just because I have a huge phobia of exposing my modesty. I remember wearing one to a 'Ethnic day' celebration in college. I had to wear a swimming trunk and loop a belt around my waist just to reassure myself.
But what the heck, these guys in movies don't even need to retie their lungi between all the fights!
Every fold and tuck is neatly in place, after 20 cinematic minutes of fights. And the shirts? Not a button comes off?
Where do they make such clothes? I need some.

Now, don't get me wrong. I realise that this is all make believe, and I really enjoy the comic relief in many of the fight sequences in Comedies. But give us more power to the punch, Mr Stunt Director.

Life is filled with so many serious stuff and Cinema is supposed to transport us far from the mundane realities of life into another world where the fine line between a punch and a pow is blurred with a dishum.


Thursday, March 25, 2010

Living the Live-in

Woke up to a heated discussion on a popular News channel.
'Is Live-in a Sin?'
As predicted, 4 quasi experts plus the Anchor engaged in bitter battle for the sake of their nation.

The root of this heated debate is a recent Supreme Court judgment terming 'Live-in relationships and premarital sex legal'. The court contended that since Krishna and Radha of Mythology lived in, it is legal and hence Indian. Since when did the highest court of our Nation, start quoting Mythology.

Nonetheless, I bet all those teenagers and 20 somethings are celebrating with wild romps in their beds since.

Religion and Mythology are very often used as crutches when authorities lack the will to do the right thing at the right time.

But this decision shocked me.
Of all the major religions in the world, none of them advocate premarital sex.

Personally, I feel sex is more than the carnal and lust filled moments of passion. It is about 2 adults coming together to show their love for each other. It is about 'making love' work.

Modern media have sensationalized sex, to such a tantalizing point of no return that some of them are simply soft porn. Men and women are encouraged and tempted to experiment. Peer pressure does not make things easy. The Media glorifies Sex and Promiscuity. Hollywood rules the roost, Bollywood is catching up, TV channels use them to increase TRPs.

Though living in appears to be straddling the best of both worlds, I still believe in the sacrament of marriage. I wouldn't have it any other way.

While I still think it is possible for a man and a woman to live under a roof without any sexual relationship, are we so prudish to think that a live-in couple who profess their love for each to abstain from premarital sex? If the love was true, they would have rather married each other.

There could be many reasons why a couple in love decide to live in. Convenience and a fairly economical way of managing the household is a primary reason. But put sex outside of marriage and you have just opened a pandora's box of social ills.

Unintended pregnancies, abortions, sense of failure, intense feeling of vengeance and the vicious cycle just goes on.

I know a certain girl who lived in with her boyfriend who professed undying love for her that would last an eternity. She believed him. They took an apartment together. Had sex, got pregnant and his promise of eternity ran out. He dumped her, would not respond to her emails or calls. He changed his number. Bitter and disillusioned, she is juggling boyfriends just to overcome her growing sense of insecurity. She knows where she went wrong, but is too scared to admit it lest the world ridicule her.

Safe Sex is a myth. The psychological, physical and emotional scars that women, in particular go through take a lifetime to heal.

Live in, but do so only when circumstances disallow you to marry.

When a couple in love starts to live in, there is a lot of anticipation and optimism. Our body plots against us too. Endorphins block our ability to look beyond love.

The truth is love does wear out. We wake up to bad morning breath and body odor. We open our eyes to crusted lip corners and pillows with our drool.

But the fact is, that is when we need to make love work. More often than not, we believe that love is about talking sweet nothings for many hours, telling things that we know the other person loves to hear. But the real trouble begins when you start living in with a person only to realize that the person you loved is not the person he/she is.

Legalizing premarital sex is akin to allowing Men to exploit Women under the guise of love.

The women in the live-in relationship have a lot at stake; their chastity, their safety and well being. Most of the time, men who live-in see this as an opportunity for regular sex sans all the responsibility that a marriage would bring.

If only we removed that gene inside us that would stop us from cheating the person we profess to love abundantly and unconditionally...
If only we could respect our lover's body and soul just the way God does...
If only we saw making love as the physical act of a cognitive emotion and not just humping...

That would be the day that we can finally say, we are Humans. That is when we can truly understand why having sex is not the same as 'making love'. That is when we can truly understand how marrying can be many times more fulfilling than a many night stand.

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