Showing posts with label Women. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Women. Show all posts

Saturday, July 29, 2017

What Women Want

What's on her mind?
What's lingering in her heart?
What's bothering her?
What makes her heart leap with joy?
What makes her pensive?
What makes her the unique person she is?

This is what every man ask themselves. 
So for the sake of all men out there asking this question and haven't watched the Mel
Gibson movie yet, this post is about what women want, from men and life?

Women take their relationships seriously and want their men to respect her as much as she does him. A man who will be invested into the relationship. 
A man who will say No to a guy's night out when his lady is feeling down so that he can stay back home and cheer her up.  Or just listen to her.
A man who will make 'Spending time with her' high on his list of priorities.
A man who isn't emotionally dependent on her to the point of suffocating her, but just enough to want to enjoy her company.
An intellectually articulate man who is loyal in his commitment towards her, sincere in his actions and compassionate to a cause, honest in his thoughts, humorous in his words, supremely confident, with an indomitable spirit of adventure and life. Everything else like wealth, athletic ability is much lower on the list of things she wants in her man. 
She wants his man to let her be the way she is, infinitely accepting of her. Of her flaws and might. Yet, she doesn't want him to agree with her all the time. 
Women aren't walking around with a mental checklist of traits and attributes but they do have a compass that navigates her to the life choices she can't live without. 

Women are sensitive. The same way men are persuasive. Women aren't clingy. But men aren't empathic either. And then sometimes, roles are reversed. 
Women don't want a Bentley. They just need a man who will take them out when they have a midnight craving for ice-cream.
Women don't want 100 sexual partners. They just need that one man who will make love to them the way Jack did with Rose. They want their man to cuddle afterward. They want to be cradled in his arms. They want to wake up next to the man who will look at her like she is the greatest creation he has known. 
Women don't want a fat alimony. They want a stable and healthy marriage that isn't tottering from anniversary to anniversary.

Women want the freedom to choose her path. They want to know they won't be taken advantage of by virtue of her relationship status, or gender. 
They want to be able to go out or let her hair loose the way she wants when she wants. They don't want to be judged, lectured to or talked down to. 

Women don't want to be forced to sleep their way to success. She wants to be acknowledged as a capable person and earn her way to a respectable place in her career. 
Women want to be able to balance a career and everything outside of the workplace with the panache of a ballet dancer without being labeled. They want a fighting chance to live a full life. Because they are every bit as ambitious as men are. 

Women don't want sexist jokes about that time of the month. They don't want jokes around what they say or don't say. They don't want to be treated with kid gloves. They don't want strangers peering down her cleavage or staring at her curves. They don't want handouts. They want men (and other women) to respect her for her tenacity, courage, and intelligence. 

Unlike what the media and certain mediocre authors say, women aren't too complicated or from Venus. Her needs are few. Her desires even less. She wants the world to see her soul without having to bare herself naked. 


Thursday, February 19, 2015

Boys Do Cry!

This is one advt that deserves a standing ovation!



Sunday, December 16, 2012

Gutless [351/365]

Source: DNA
Okay, so India is not the safest place for a woman and we've just proven that today. Last night, a 23 year old physiotherapy student who was visiting Delhi before she starts interning was gang-raped. By six men on a joy ride in an unlicensed bus. The six took turns raping her in the most horrific way possible, while driving around in the city. They assaulted her with an iron crowbar so severely that her intestines have suffered irreparable damage and when they had enough, threw her male friend's and her naked body out the bus and fled.

As news of this tragedy spread, India erupted.
Considering how our politicians have been politically impotent, the government fumbled. And how!

The faceless victim has lost most of her intestines due to infection and remains on ventilator. Her male friend is critical but stable and out of danger. She was alert and spoke to her family before she was wheeled in for surgery.
She might live to give a testimony but may not live long enough to see justice being served.

The bastards who raped her, had robbed another man just a few minutes before they picked her up. Had the policemen on duty accepted the man's complaint and acted, the young girl would have gone on to achieve her dreams. But the men saw the victim and her male friend at a bus stop and decided to lure them by offering to ferry them. Little did they know this could be the ride from hell. We don't know what happened within the bus but that hardly matters.

What the men did to the young girl was so brutal that Saddam would blush. But this is not uncommon. Like it or not, she is just a statistic. If numbers speak, Delhi has had more rapes reported this year than every other city in India put together. And we are not even counting the sexual innuendos and other harassment that women live with. Going by the low rate of rapes that get reported, this could be just the tip of the proverbial iceberg.
Why are Indian men so ravenous? Why is our national capital putting us to shame?
The answers could be simple.
Indian parents use different yardsticks to raise their sons. They are trained to compartmentalize and objectify women. Mothers ingrain the thought that women are mere maids and reproductive systems meant to satisfy their father's appetite.
Women are mere objects of a man's desire.

And in case a lady does work, the men at the workplace will ogle at her cleavage, discuss her body (in detail) during their nicotine breaks, and then fantasize about her when making love to his girlfriend/wife/concubine.
I've had male coworkers who would befriend women just so that they can bump and touch her and then discuss about it with their homies.

While much of India protests, I'm beginning to wonder about our double standards. It appears that we are suddenly aghast at how the faceless young girl was brutalized and is fighting for her life.
How many of us remember Aruna Shanbaug?
Why won't we fight for her rights? Or is she a lost cause because we don't see her pain anymore?

We are the real culprits.
Our women are the real victims.


Thursday, December 06, 2012

The Squeeze [341/365]

While it has been established without the shadow of a doubt that India is a ruthless place for a modern woman, it is a equally cruel place for men who try and protect women.

Three men including an Akali Dal activist murdered an Assistant Sub Inspector (ASI) of the Punjab Police when he tried to prevent them from molesting his daughter. Punjab, though, is no exception.

I have seen too many instances of men groping young women in their privates in broad day light. In many cases, the victims do confront the culprits who will pretend like nothing happened. The victims are disoriented and they just decide to get along with their life rather than confront them anymore.
The men will smirk, pass a knowing look to their accomplices and move on to their next target.
In many cases, this happens with the full knowledge of the local cops and politicians.

So what is it that compels a man to grope?
Is he checking for hidden artifacts? I don't think so.
Or maybe he is checking if the flesh is ripe? Possible.

Whatever it could be, he definitely does not want his victim to revolt against him. He wants his women subdued - physically and mentally.
What possible satisfaction could a man get from squeezing a girl's breast or pinching her butt?

I'll probably have to get inside the head of a 'squeezer' or a 'pincher' to even understand why he does this.
Watch this space for more information after my research.


Saturday, November 03, 2012

Acid Love [308/365]

Many many years ago, one of my girlfriend said something that I never forgot.
'If I can't have you, no one else should'

She may have said that in jest at the time but she meant every syllable of that statement later. When I wanted to break up with her, she did everything she could to cling on.

When was the last time someone tried to destroy you when they couldn't 'have' you all for themselves?
Chances are most of you will nod your heads in agreement.
Today, when I read about acid attacks and honor killings, a little shiver goes up my spine.
My ex knew all the right men and had all the right tact to have quietly taken care of me. I was living alone after all. But she didn't and for that I am thankful to God.

What does a parent achieve when they kill their son or daughter in the name of honor and pride?
I could see how they will react in a fit of anger and misplaced aggression, but do they really experience any remorse?
Where are they getting their ideas to kill from?
What are they gaining by snuffing out one of their own?
Are they trying to set an example for other parents and their children or are we witnessing a silent revolution of murder and revenge?

If you have seen the plight and agony that a burn victim goes through, you'll perhaps understand how life changes in just a few moments. Multiply that agony by a thousand and that is what a victim of an acid attack goes through.
Trapped in a body that does not make sense with a mind that can't fight anymore, most acid victims die a little every single moment until ...

An acid victim won't get much votes or publicity in a country as populous as ours. In the time that it has taken me to write this post, there has already been 1 honor killing, 1 acid attack and 4 rapes.

Time to stop?


Friday, October 12, 2012

Of rapes and candle-light vigils [287/365]

In a country where we don't like our women, it is strange that we love to rape them. 
It appears that we don't want them to live a dignified life but as mere instruments of our unbridled lust. We don't want them to work or earn the same jobs that we do, we hate their guts and love to 'share' news of how that girl in your office is sleeping around when she gets ahead in her career.
But the moment you get a lady under you (no pun intended) you begin to think of ways to exploit her trust in you. We want our women to be locked inside the four walls and balconies of our homes. We want them to cook, clean and care of us and our offspring. Oh yeah, we also want them to bear atleast 4 kids who must have your surname and her sweat and tears.

Our ministers are no better. While I won't blame the men since Indian politicians are all of the same sewer, one Haryana minister kicked up dust when she said "I have no hesitation to say that 90% of the girls go with consent. They find criminal-minded people later (who rape them). The girls don't realise that there are 5-10 boys (waiting for them),". Gee, so I guess this means she will be sending her consenting daughters to be raped too. 
This was in reaction to why Haryana has taken over the moniker of rape capital after having 19 reported rapes in 30 days and 8 in the last 4 days.

To be fair, I think the statistics would be barely a fraction of what is really happening. It could be just a case of more victims finding the courage to report than previously. Most states in the north have had the notorious reputation of men who rape and go scot-free. Many women that I've spoken to dread visiting States like Delhi, Mumbai and Kolkatta while women who migrate from the north find the south too demure for their taste.


Unfortunately, crimes against women will forever be one of our enduring legacy unless we learn to treat every single woman as preciously as we ought to treat our mothers and sisters.

Candle-light vigils won't do anymore.


Thursday, August 16, 2012

Three steps back [229/365]

Source: http://www.hcs.calpoly.edu/
Today's post is about two women.

The first victim, a 26 year old mother on her way back home was kidnapped in plain sight of a thousand people, bundled into a minivan, blindfolded and gang-raped for several hours until she was 'dumped' at the spot where she was kidnapped. This glorious incident happened in Didi's Kolkata.
The second is that of a 28 year old researcher who was found unconscious in the bed of a male colleague. Although the finger of suspicion points towards the male colleague, the victim refuses to be examined for proof of sexual assault. This happened at IIT Mumbai.

Both are victims of a crime so repulsive that we choose not to do anything about it.
I'm sure we all hate hearing about women getting raped. But we are simply too weak-kneed to do anything about it. Instead of ensuring we punish the guilty as swiftly as possible, the apex court of the country banned all vehicles from using sun-film on their windows. The court's contention was that there were too many women being raped within cars that had their windows darkened by sun-film. Big effing deal. Going by how women are still getting raped, I don't think sun-film was to blame. The bastards now are doing it within the comfort of their bedrooms. Whats next? The Supreme Court will tell us that we are not supposed to have curtains in our bedrooms?

In the event when the rape is obvious, the stigma that follows is humungous. You are seen as a facilitator of another man's lust and never a victim of a crime. You dressed provocatively and spoke loosely. He was simply following all the 'cues' that you were throwing out to him. You are the dispensable part of our lives. We need you to give birth to our sons. That's all.

In a couple of decades and when it is too late, we will realize that, perhaps, we should have protected you better. Respected you a little more and provided for you a little more.

Suggested Reading:


Wednesday, July 18, 2012

A new low [200/365]

In the past week we saw the men of our nation reach a new low. A random group of men pounced upon a defenceless young girl who couldnt be older than 20, stripping and abusing her in a way that would resemble a pack of hyenas mauling a wildebeest calf.
In a video taken by a cameraman, the girl is seen begging, trying to reason with her attackers, pleading, and running for help to just about anyone she could spot. No one would help her instead we see passersby taking their shots too. After all its not everyday you get to grab the privates of a young girl and get away. The girl is screaming, shrieking in fear and probably wondering why none came to her help. About 30 minutes into the mauling, cops arrive at the scene after a good Samaritan calls to report the assault. Most of the champs have slipped into the crowd that gathered and the cameraman shoves a microphone into he face of the girl for the freshest sound bytes. After all he knew this video could be the money shot. He was right. His video went viral and so did half a dozen other videos that other 'cameramen' took. Some of them were even taking pictures of the 'event' to make sure they captured whatever remained of the girl's modesty for their private voyeur collection.


A couple of days after the incident the men who perpetrated this crime are yet to to caught by an administration that is beyond apathy. After a brief session of mutual finger pointing, and much needed publicity of the incident, I am left wondering what really is happening here.
I mean this is an open and shut case.

Here we have a girl who is probably still a teen who went with her friends to have a good time drinking and partying. It is reported that she had an altercation with a gentleman who was eventually asked to leave by the club security. He lies in wait for the girl to come out, passes a lewd comment which riles up the girl and she may have said something back to him. Infuriated, he starts attacking her with a frenzy. The man's pals pitch in and for good measure. Passersby get their fill too and by the time the now infamous video is taken we can see her top is almost ripped off. We see her scrambling for cover and help and the perpetrators muffling her screams and dragging her to the side to resume the groping and the mauling. 

Recently I watched Piranha and the way the men were taking shots at her, ripping her clothes and hitting her resembled the way the piranhas were feeding off their victims. It makes for excellent entertainment in such a movie but when I saw this happen to another human being, I was outraged, shocked and saddened.

Maybe the cameraman should have been more proactive in getting cops to the scene faster. Surely he did expose an incident that would have otherwise remained just a statistic and an event that's changed the life of the victim for ever. The role of the person is infinitely debatable. But would he have stood and done as little if it was his sister or wife being molested?

Maybe the girl was wrong and foolish in stepping out as late as she did without a male escort. Surely she is too young to be partying that late but she should have definitely used the proper judgement when she stepped out after an altercation. Men from the northeast are quite the boisterous handful.

Surely the general public that passed by and did nothing is as guilty of the crime as the ones who committed it. While we can say this is a sign of a bigger rot in society, this can also be explained as the syndrome where we tend to think that someone else will take care of this and we wont need to interfere. Or maybe they thought the mob was just -lynching a prostitute/witch, which apparently is quite common in that part of the world.

Whatever the reasoning, the cops showed their true colors when they refused to own up to the crime and instead reasoned otherwise.
But then this is the real rot in our country. We have cops and politicians who are unscrupulous and insensitive.

Shamefully, we are yet to arrest all the perpetrators despite their pictures being plastered across the country. And in the event that they do get caught, I doubt if any of them will have any remorse or if our courts will have the nerve to make an example out of them.


Saturday, April 14, 2012

Just another day for Poonam [104/365]

Okay, so men in India really missed something monumental.
The International Cleavage Day, on the 31st March.
But Poonam Panday obviously didn't miss it. She posted a picture of herself celebrating her cleavage. Woo Hoo!

Question here. Did we really need an entire day to celebrate cleavage? The idea, supported by Wonderbra together with Cosmo, thinks the day is necessary.
Wonderbra PRO says: "It is a day for women to realize that their cleavage is something unique and that they should be proud of it. It gives women a chance to be beautiful and glow in the furtive, yet appreciative, glances their cleavage evokes from men". She also explained, "It gives men a legitimate reason to stare at boobs." (sic)
Wow! Seriously?!
One of the reasons why men won't take women seriously is because we have women who think this way.
If they really wanted to make things better for women all over the world, the bra company could've used their PR genius and marketing millions at the right place. Stopping harassment and abuse at the workplace and elsewhere.
Instead, they've objectified women. They're promoting an evil that is beyond borders.

So, who else is this for?
For men who want an excuse to stare? Surely!
For women who want an excuse to show their plunging necklines and everything else.
And for unscrupulous plastic surgeons. An odd boob job is a fantastic way to earn much more.

I'm one for fun, but isn't this taking it a little too far?
International awareness days are important. We have the World Health Day and the World AIDS Day that really mean a lot and actually spread awareness and build support. While I can see the potential for awareness that the International Cleavage day can bring, but how can women get any meaningful support (apart from the obvious support of a bra) from society?

What's next?
Jockey will announce a 'Bulge in your pants' Day?

Now, after her infamous let down last year, I'd secretly vowed to resist all her promises this year. And not mention her in my blog this year. Darn, missed that one.
She continues to check Google to see if she is hot that day. Good news is she isn't. Woo Hoo!


Wednesday, April 04, 2012

Do not try this at home [94/365]

NOTE: This post might contain sections that might offend your sensibility. 
Reader discretion is advised.

In a matriarchal society like Kerala, rapes were (note the tense) a rarity. Women were the more respected among the gender. One of the most oft heard rhetorical statement meant to put any adventurous man into shame was - 'Don't you have mothers and sisters in your family?'

But that was in the past.
Back from one of my trips to Kerala, I could see the difference. Politicians are public enemies of the young women.
Bus stations and roads are fair ground for gropers who lurk. I've heard stories of middle-aged married women who were groped in buses and were passed lewd comments and gestures while passing them on the street.
Ofcourse these men do have mothers, sisters and wives.
Source: CreativeCommons
Off all the women who I know has been preyed upon and victimized by ruthless men, Furuta Junko's is the one that stands out in my mind as the epitome of what men are capable of.

Furuto is a school girl who became a victim of cultural violence.
Abducted on her way to work by four teenagers and brutally raped in the most unimaginable way until she died of the torture 44 days later. (Read about the torture here)

Why did Furuka unwittingly spur on the boys into torturing her more?
Why didn't the perpetrators display any signs of remorse or conscience?
Why were the parents and neighbors silent and unwitting spectators to such a crime?
And more importantly why didn't the justice system deliver?

We cannot really blame the perpetrators nor the victim of what happened.
I believe Japan's deep rooted cultural references influenced a crime this grotesque.

One of the perpetrators were a low level yakuza leader.
The Yakuza, the Japanese mob, was and is still highly feared and respected, depending on who you ask. With the government unwilling to step in to curb the influence, the yakuza grew. Much of how the yakuza grew in power and might is also one of the reason why Japan is extremely resilient. In the years following the devastating nuclear attack that ended the WW2, the yakuza made sure that the people got their lives up and running.

During the ordeal, Furuka was gang raped by hundreds of men, was beaten and her teenaged body ravaged in unimaginable ways. Ways that I've only seen and heard happening during wartime. Why?
The answers lie in the most unlikeliest places - Porn.
In Japanese porn, like porn anywhere else, the girl is often a teenager.
But unlike porn in the West, the girls in the Japanese porn are portrayed as weak, timid and scared yet silently and secretly wanting a good 'session'. The lady will always put up a fight, request to be left alone and in peace, yet give in to the man's physical dominance. The lady is forced to strip often in full view of a dozen or more men watching her. What follows is a good measure of foreplay, if it can be termed that. The lady will be forced to masturbate herself while the men proceed to insert dildos, vibrators of every color, size and intensity inside her vagina. Some of the movies will even display extreme bondage and S&M. Apparently S&M movies are a wild rage in the Orient. The women in these movies often take part in group sex with as many as 50 men, all of whom will ejaculate inside her. Through the entire ordeal (which can take an hour or so) the lady will moan, cry and sob in 'pretend' pain (many of the performers have even perfected the art of faking a moan and to quiver in pleasure as the man ejaculates inside her). What is unmistakable is the degree (and the similarities) of the violence that the men inflict on the woman.

While many of us will not like to admit this, this is not something endemic only to Japan.
Coincidentally, many 'desi' MMS's and much of the amateur porn that circulate the internet today is a very grim reminder of the amount of violence, perversion and voyeurism in the society today. Many young men who watch such clips and movies are addicted to the notion that women enjoy being violently raped. They are addicted to the idea of having an orgy with a single woman. While some of them will never rape a lady, most of them who have the means and the time will do the deed. Judging by the number of posts and kind of comments within adult forums, raping a girl (teen) or a lady and taking a video of you doing it is highly expected if you want to be a raging stud online.
As a result, pictures of cleavage, navel and nipples of unsuspecting women are flooding the internet in a way that was unimaginable just a few years ago. Clips from hidden cameras at hotel rooms, changing rooms, shower rooms are a common place online. On a recent visit to Goa, my wife found a hidden camera in a changing room at a very popular bikini showroom. When we pointed this out to the female shop assistant, she was nonchalant and brushed it off as a non incident. The voyeur turns into the perpetrator and the cycle continues.

In a circle where the real becomes reel and vice versa, men are recording what they do, how they do it and who they are doing it with, with less impunity and more bravado. Forums have posts boasting the frequency of updates ('daily updates', some declare),  the date, time and place of the act.

In the west, as people become more aware and vocal against such incidents, corporations and individuals have been working towards correcting our tendency to imitate art (pun intended). In one of the most eloquent instances of how one corporation has been making a mark, the World Wrestling Entertainment (WWE) has been running a campaign for many years warning, coercing and encouraging viewers and fans to not attempt any of the stunts or fights they see on the show at home, school or anywhere. And it's worked. Statistics show that violence imitating the WWE fights have come down in many parts of America. Many Adult movie producers and performers encourage safe sex and discourage sexual violence. While sorority date rapes and drunk orgies will still continue, many youngsters are more careful about what happens and when than a couple of years ago if the current Spring breaks are any indication. The wet TShirt competition and spontaneous public displays of sexuality are less popular than until a few years ago.

While no one's advocating absolute abstinence, the balance of society fails when men and boys try what they see on TV, in movies and on the internet on women no matter who you are.

Recommended Read:
Devoid of Morals


Monday, March 26, 2012

A spade's call [85/365]

Bebo, as Kareena Kapoor is fondly called, will do her raunchiest and boldest 'intimate' scene in mainstream cinema ever, for one of the most anticipated Bollywood movie this year - Heroine.
In Bollywood, as in Hollywood, as movies approach their premiere the grapevine will churn out juicy gossip for the drooling journalists and paparazzi. So it's business as usual for Bollywood.

While none of these heroines or 'movie stars' can claim to be naive or innocent, what is surprising is how naive we are. A spat and a disagreement is great news. More so if such an incident can boost the excitement of that movie.
Bollywood is the carrot for most Indian and Western women who have more beauty than brains. They win a few beauty contests, do a few photo-shoots and then a movie, a reality show or an ad.
So what if the debut is not exactly their claim to fame. Any fame is good news.

Barring a few, most actresses are incredibly superficial. I find their declarations to never do an item number or nudity and to do movies only if the script makes sense extremely hypocritical. Give them a few flops and you'll hear them talking about that 'very essential' nude scene/item number in the next movie. But what if you are still the reigning queen, with newer starlets offering to shed their clothes for less or no reason, the pressure to pleasure and titillate increases within actresses at the top.

While many remain addicted to the constant gaze of the limelight, some will fortunately find the fuller things in life.
Some will settle down with a husband and kids and some will find fulfillment in alternate careers.
But most of them will do just about anything to stay in the news, for that 15 minutes of fame. To be the flavor of the day, the month, and the quarter.

After all, the next new starlet is just around the corner, and you'll be last year's news.



Friday, March 23, 2012

From beyond the grave [82/365]

Two days ago, a Pune court sentenced to death two drivers who raped and murdered a BPO staffer many years ago.
While I sympathize with loss of any human life, the system erred too.

Six years ago, one of my friend's colleague boarded a cab to go to work.
That was the last time she was seen alive.
Her cab driver drove her to an isolated village, raped her and killed her. Her belongings were stolen and it took a full three days before the driver was nabbed.
This crime created ripples in the BPO and ITES industry. (The news here)
Wide-sweeping changes were introduced.
Female employees would be accompanied by escorts when they traveled at night.
The Drivers can no longer call the female employees themselves but the transport help desk of the company, who would conference the employee with the driver.
Employees, on their part, where cautioned to not get 'too' friendly with the drivers, who are mostly illiterate and migrate from villages to cities in search of jobs.
Companies spent many lakhs in revamping the transport department, streamlining and plugging loopholes.
In the meanwhile, the driver responsible for this was only recently sentenced to death.

There is no easy way to describe a crime so gruesome, but there are a lot of loose ends.
How do I know? Well, I worked in the same company with the same people who worked and traveled with her. The same people who were warned by the company to be silent about the crime.
The driver had a previous grudge against the lady since she had complained against him. He lost his job shortly after this. This had sparked vengeance in his mind. Whether the complaint was genuine or not will never be proven. But this is true- Most employees, mainly women are very mean towards drivers. They expect them to be their chauffeurs, at their beck and call. Many won't step out of their house unless the driver is at their doorstep. Most will not hesitate to sent out a complaint.

Companies have always treated their women with kid gloves. Many of them are petrified of possible sexual harassment from frivolous women. Proving innocence becomes the onus of the companies.
At the expense of making sure complaints raised by women are dealt with promptly, they rush to grab the calf when the bull gives birth. The driver may have broken a traffic rule or two, may have been rude or silent at the employee, but this certainly didn't have to lead to a termination.
The company erred on their part by not being sensitive towards the driver. He was after all an employee with all the aspirations that the lady would have had too.

But the crime has sparked debate on how a lone driver who weighed less than the victim could drag her out, rape her and slit her throat. Although he has denied the role of any accomplices, I doubt it. When it took two men to do the same deed on a lady in Pune, I wonder how a lone driver could manage to carry it off in Bangalore. Interestingly, the husband of the victim had taken up an insurance on his wife only a few months before the murder. And he stood to get a million rupees (Rs 1,813,693/- to be exact) in the event of an unfortunate or unnatural death. If the bells have not started ringing yet, here's more. He mourned the loss of his wife and love of his life, got the cheque for a million rupees and then moved to another city to marry again to start his life afresh with a pot-load of cash. The needle of suspicion also points to the husband since he didn't seem too inclined to fight for the truth.
The law erred on their part when they didn't dig deep enough at the right time.

Companies periodically sent out reminders of their transport policy which indicate that employees are not supposed to build a rapport or unnecessary conversation. They are cautioned against 'pissing' the drivers off or asking the driver to change the radio station of their choice. Some companies even portray them as people who would not know how to behave themselves with women and can be tempted easily.
The system erred, when companies started treating drivers like third rate citizens.

I've traveled with all kinds of drivers. Some rude, some impatient, some indifferent, some ignorant. I've also traveled with drivers who are graduates, owners of businesses and married men who have been doing their job for more than a decade. A common feeling is how a single driver has soiled their reputation and trade. But most of them have been good people, with aspirations just the same as mine. One driver even wanted to learn many languages and do a bachelors degree through IGNOU (Indira Gandhi National Open University).
It's easy for us to be irate at them when they pick us up a hour early or even if they don't. I know people who direct all their pent up rage and frustration towards drivers.
We erred too. By creating a bias in society, we've set ourselves up.

RIP. Let's hope we don't suffer more Prathiba's and Jyothikumari's.


Wednesday, February 29, 2012

Quarter times the fun [59/365]

This month just got longer.
February 2012 was an exciting month.
As rightly predicted, this month did have all the ingredients that could quench our insatiable thirst for gossip and voyeurism.

Personally, I've had a good month. I've been able to achieve some of my personal and professional goals and I set new ones for the rest of the year.

Dirty Word of the Month: Sexy
When the Chairperson of the National Commission for Women (NCW), Mamata Sharma said and I quote "'You should take the comment in a positive manner instead of protesting, resisting or going to the police' (Foot in Mouth here), I was rubbing my eyes in disbelief. It was truly a WTF moment.

I remember the first time I heard and used the word. As an impressionable 16 year old, the word was taboo.
But when chairperson of a committee that is supposed to be the watchdog of women in India confirmed that using the word was okay, I was finally at peace.

While I don't think this foot in mouth comment of her's could lead to any more rapes than what will happen or if this will lead to Indian women loosing their integrity, because I know that Indian women are made of sterner and worthier morals than what Mamta Sharma can claim to possess. 

And as for women, if living in India's lecherous metro and her conservative villages amidst a million gazes was not enough, now her 'Roadside Romeos' can finally expand their vocabulary too.


Thursday, October 13, 2011

44 days

Reposted
This is a true story that happened in Japan in 1988.

A 17 year old girl named Furuta Junko, was kidnapped and then tortured by 4 boys with very unimaginable way and finally death after 44 days.

For you who can`t stand read something that is so cruel, don’t read this. Please join the Facebook Group, that was made in her honor.

*******
The crime:

In November of 1988, Boy A (18), Boy B (Jo Kamisaku, 17; Kamisaku was a new family name he took after being released from prison), Boy C (16) and Boy D (17) from Tokyo abducted Furuta, a second year high school (grade 11) student from Saitama Prefecture in Misato, for 44 days. They kept her captive in the house owned by the parents of Boy C.

To forestall a manhunt, Boy A coerced Furuta into calling her own parents and telling them that she had run away from home, but was with “a friend” and was not in danger. He also browbeat her into posing as one of the boys’ girlfriends when the parents of the house where she was held were around, but when it became clear that the parents would not call the police, he dropped this pretext.

Furuta tried to escape several times, begging the parents of Boy C more than once to help her, but they did nothing, apparently out of fear that Boy A would hurt them. Boy A was at the time a low-level yakuza leader and had bragged that he could use his connections to kill anyone who interfered.

According to their statements at their trial, the four of them raped her, beat her, introduced foreign objects including an iron rod into her vagina, made her drink her own urine and was fed cockroaches, inserted fireworks into her anus, and set them off, forced Furuta to masturbate, cut her nipple with pliers, dropped dumbbells onto her stomach, and burned her with cigarettes and lighters. (One of the burnings was punishment for attempting to call the police.)

At one point her injuries were so severe that according to one of the boys it took more than an hour for her to crawl downstairs to use the bathroom. They also related that “possibly a hundred different people” knew that Furuta had been imprisoned there, but it is not clear if this means they visited the house at different times while she was imprisoned there, or themselves either raped or abused her.

When the boys refused to let her leave, she begged them on several occasions to “kill (her) and get it over with“.

On January 4, 1989, using one of the boys’ loss at mah-jongg as a pretext, the four beat her with an iron barbell, poured lighter fluid on her legs, arms, face and stomach, and set her on fire. She died later that day of shock.

The four boys claimed that they were not aware of how badly injured she was, and that they believed she had been malingering.
The killers hid her corpse in an 55-gallon drum filled with cement; the perpetrators disposed the drum in a tract of reclaimed land in Koto, Tokyo.

*****
Arrest and punishment

The boys were arrested and tried as adults; but, because of Japanese handling of crimes committed by juveniles, their identities were sealed by the court. However, a weekly magazine Shukan Bunshun reported their real names, claiming “Human rights aren’t needed for brutes.” Furuta’s real name and details about her personal life were reported exhaustively in the media. Kamisaku was judged as a sub leader, at least according to the official trial.

The four boys pled guilty to a reduced charge of “committing bodily injury that resulted in death“, rather than murder. Boy A’s parents sold their house for approximately 50 million yen and paid this as compensation to Furuta’s family.

For his participation in the crime, Kamisaku served eight years in a juvenile prison before he was released, in August 1999. In July 2004, he was arrested for assaulting an acquaintance, whom he believed to be luring a girlfriend away from him, and allegedly bragged about his earlier infamy. Kamisaku was sentenced to seven years in prison for the beating.

Junko’s parents were dismayed by the sentences received by their daughter’s killers, and enjoined a civil suit against the parents of the boy in whose home the crimes were committed. When some of the convictions were overturned on the basis of problematic physical evidence (the semen and pubic hair recovered from the body did not match those of the boys who were arrested), the lawyer handling the civil suit decided there was no case to be made and refused to represent them further. (There is speculation that the evidence may have been contaminated—for example, by unidentified persons who raped Furuta.)

One of the most disturbing parts of this true story is that her killers are now free. After putting Junko Furuta through all that suffering, they are free men!!! And only have 8 years in prison.

==

“A high-school girl was abducted by four teenaged hooligans while she was on her way to work. They took her to the house of a friend, held her in his bedroom, and for the next forty-five days enacted every imaginable form of abuse on her (and some you wouldn’t want to imagine). They gang-raped her—both with their own bodies and with an assortment of foreign objects—beat her, kicked her, doused her extremities with lighter fluid and set her on fire, and probably did many other things to her that went undocumented by either her tormentors or the police. They mocked her pain. They held her down and dropped barbells on her stomach. This last bit of torture was more than she could withstand, and after going into convulsions she apparently either strangled on her own vomit or simply died from her beatings. When the boys were questioned later about why they didn’t do anything during her seizure, they replied, “We assumed she was faking it.”

“She tried to escape, more than once. The first time, she was caught in the process of making a phone call. The second time, she ran into the parents of the boy who lived there; apparently they had known all along what was gong on. She begged them to help her, but they refused; his friend had criminal connections, and they didn’t want to get into trouble, too. After her death, they taped her arms and legs together, threw her into a 55-gallon drum, filled it with cement, and dumped it in an empty lot. The body wasn’t recovered until almost a year later. The ringleader of the whole incident served seven years in prison and is now a free man.”

*******

What they did to her and the suffering

These horrifying things done to Junko Furuta had been collected through the Japanese court trial of the case, and blogs from 1989. They show the pain that Junko Furuta had to endure before she was finally dead. All this had happened to her while she was still alive. They are disturbing, but the truth.

All of this had happened.

-

DAY 1: November 22, 1988: Kidnapped
Kept captive in house, and posed as one of boy’s girlfriend
Raped (over 400 times in total)
Forced to call her parents and tell them she had run away
Starved and malnutritioned
Fed cockroaches to eat and urine to drink
Forced to masturbate
Forced to strip in front of others
Burned with cigarette lighters
Foreign objects inserted into her vagina/anus

DAY 11: December 1, 1988: Severely beat up countless times
Face held against concrete ground and jumped on
Hands tied to ceiling and body used as a punching bag
Nose filled with so much blood that she can only breath through her mouth
Dumbbells dropped onto her stomach
Vomited when tried to drink water (her stomach couldn’t accept it)
Tried to escape and punished by cigarette burning on arms
Flammable liquid poured on her feet and legs, then lit on fire
Bottle inserted into her anus, causing injury

DAY 20: December10, 1989: Unable to walk properly due to severe leg burns
Beat with bamboo sticks
Fireworks inserted into anus and lit
Hands smashed by weights and fingernails kracked
Beaten with golf club
Cigarettes inserted into vagina
Beaten with iron rods repeatedly
Winter; forced outside to sleep in balcony
Skewers of grilled chicken inserted into her vagina and anus, causing bleeding

DAY 30: Hot wax dripped onto face
Eyelids burned by cigarette lighter
Stabbed with sewing needles in chest area
Left nipple cut and destroyed with pliers
Hot light bulb inserted into her vagina
Heavy bleeding from vagina due to scissors insertion
Unable to urinate properly
Injuries were so severe that it took over an hour for her to crawl downstairs and use the bathroom
Eardrums severely damaged
Extreme reduced brain size

DAY 40: Begged her torturers to “kill her and get it over with”

January 1, 1989: Junko greets the New Years Day alone
Body mutilated
Unable to move from the ground

DAY 44: January 4, 1989: The four boys beat her mutilated body with an iron barbell, using a loss at the game of Mah-jongg as a pretext. She is profusely bleeding from her mouth and nose. They put a candle’s flame to her face and eyes.

Then, lighter fluid was poured onto her legs, arms, face and stomach, and then lit on fire. This final torture lasted for a time of two hours.

Junko Furuta died later that day, in pain and alone. Nothing could compare 44 days of suffering she had to go through.

When her mother heard the news and details of what had happened to her daughter, she fainted. She had to undergo a psychiatric outpatient treatment . Imagine her endless pain.

This story from 1989 is true. Please spread her story around. Everyone should know about the existence of Junko Furuta’s unimaginable and incomprehensible suffering, and this is why this group has been made.


Sunday, March 06, 2011

Licence to Rape

A recent article I read shocked me. 
'Every third rape in India is in a moving car.'

But why was I not surprised?
A cursory glance in a national newspaper will have atleast one rape that happened in the past week where young (virile) lads decided to have some fun by kidnapping a girl as if they were plucking a flower from a plant, rape her while driving around and then drop her in some God forsaken part of town, letting her get on with whatever is left of her modesty, and life.
Official apathy does not help the cause of the victim either. Cops estimate that only 3 per cent of the perpetrators are strangers which means a staggering 97 per cent of them sons of bitches will probably be your cousin brother(s), uncle(s), neighbor(s), colleague(s) or friend(s).
This also means that the cops will not register your complaint as a rape, that is if you have the guts to actually report it. 

But why cars?
Research shows that most cities in India don't have any laws that prohibit cars from heavy tinted glasses and deafening loud music. 
Raping / assaulting in a moving car gives the perpetrator a huge sense of exhilaration.
That might explain why we still cannot stick to a lane. 
Cars give the rapists a sense of achievement and control. Control because the rapist(s) don't have to get a room, can finish their act in the comfort of their backseat and toss the carcass out in the typical Indian way.

Violence towards women is a very real threat. More so in India than other places that I've lived in.
I've always noticed Indian men in India, are more disrespectful towards women who are well dressed. Many could debate why a woman would need to dress herself up nicely if she didn't want attention from men. Personally, I feel this is a debate that smacks of sexism but what no one stops to ponder is that maybe, women have the same right (and need) to feel pretty as men have the same urge to look dashing.

Carry a pepper spray. Most men would not dare to taste a slap that will blind them.

In the meanwhile, I'm trying to wonder what our culprits and their parents would be thinking.
Assuming that they have any conscience, would they be regretting having bought their son, his first car? Or would they be trying to hush up the case, buy the girl's silence and possibly the rest of her body too?

Too late now, though.

Be safe.


Wednesday, May 19, 2010

Yay for Feminists?!

              
            


Thursday, March 25, 2010

Living the Live-in


Woke up to a heated discussion on a popular News channel.
'Is Live-in a Sin?'
As predicted, 4 quasi experts plus the Anchor engaged in bitter battle for the sake of their nation.

The root of this heated debate is a recent Supreme Court judgment terming 'Live-in relationships and premarital sex legal'. The court contended that since Krishna and Radha of Mythology lived in, it is legal and hence Indian. Since when did the highest court of our Nation, start quoting Mythology.

Nonetheless, I bet all those teenagers and 20 somethings are celebrating with wild romps in their beds since.

Religion and Mythology are very often used as crutches when authorities lack the will to do the right thing at the right time.

But this decision shocked me.
Of all the major religions in the world, none of them advocate premarital sex.

Personally, I feel sex is more than the carnal and lust filled moments of passion. It is about 2 adults coming together to show their love for each other. It is about 'making love' work.

Modern media have sensationalized sex, to such a tantalizing point of no return that some of them are simply soft porn. Men and women are encouraged and tempted to experiment. Peer pressure does not make things easy. The Media glorifies Sex and Promiscuity. Hollywood rules the roost, Bollywood is catching up, TV channels use them to increase TRPs.

Though living in appears to be straddling the best of both worlds, I still believe in the sacrament of marriage. I wouldn't have it any other way.

While I still think it is possible for a man and a woman to live under a roof without any sexual relationship, are we so prudish to think that a live-in couple who profess their love for each to abstain from premarital sex? If the love was true, they would have rather married each other.

There could be many reasons why a couple in love decide to live in. Convenience and a fairly economical way of managing the household is a primary reason. But put sex outside of marriage and you have just opened a pandora's box of social ills.

Unintended pregnancies, abortions, sense of failure, intense feeling of vengeance and the vicious cycle just goes on.

I know a certain girl who lived in with her boyfriend who professed undying love for her that would last an eternity. She believed him. They took an apartment together. Had sex, got pregnant and his promise of eternity ran out. He dumped her, would not respond to her emails or calls. He changed his number. Bitter and disillusioned, she is juggling boyfriends just to overcome her growing sense of insecurity. She knows where she went wrong, but is too scared to admit it lest the world ridicule her.

Safe Sex is a myth. The psychological, physical and emotional scars that women, in particular go through take a lifetime to heal.

Live in, but do so only when circumstances disallow you to marry.

When a couple in love starts to live in, there is a lot of anticipation and optimism. Our body plots against us too. Endorphins block our ability to look beyond love.

The truth is love does wear out. We wake up to bad morning breath and body odor. We open our eyes to crusted lip corners and pillows with our drool.

But the fact is, that is when we need to make love work. More often than not, we believe that love is about talking sweet nothings for many hours, telling things that we know the other person loves to hear. But the real trouble begins when you start living in with a person only to realize that the person you loved is not the person he/she is.

Legalizing premarital sex is akin to allowing Men to exploit Women under the guise of love.

The women in the live-in relationship have a lot at stake; their chastity, their safety and well being. Most of the time, men who live-in see this as an opportunity for regular sex sans all the responsibility that a marriage would bring.

If only we removed that gene inside us that would stop us from cheating the person we profess to love abundantly and unconditionally...
If only we could respect our lover's body and soul just the way God does...
If only we saw making love as the physical act of a cognitive emotion and not just humping...

That would be the day that we can finally say, we are Humans. That is when we can truly understand why having sex is not the same as 'making love'. That is when we can truly understand how marrying can be many times more fulfilling than a many night stand.


Tuesday, March 23, 2010

Chopping Block


India, 'Mera Bharat Mahaan'
Incredible !ndia, sold off to unsuspecting tourists and the unnerving backpackers alike.
India, the birth place of one of the most charismatic and powerful non violent movements ever in human history.

India, Seventy Eight Women are raped every hour.
Gandhi must be rolling in his grave.

If this was not enough to shock you, get a load of this; Only 1 in 70 cases are ever reported.
This means, of all the bastards out there that will rape a lady, only 20% ever get to see the insides of a court. And only 3 in 1000 offenders are ever punished!

So that means there are 997 of the monsters walking free, trumping their noses at the long arm of the law. I wonder if we ever realise that by freeing the 997, we've just raped the lady with the scales.
Sure, we have a lot of rules and severe punishment for those who rape/molest a woman, but the gory statistics reveal the truth.


In a society that prefers to brush topics like sex under the rug and alternate lifestyles are taboo, what would you expect?
Its a Man's world unfortunately and the MCP's win the battle nearly all the time.

So whats really plaguing our society? Why has the land which gave birth to such concepts as Kamasutra and Non violence suddenly become the 'Rape Capital of the World'?
Why are we so lethargic about laws that concern the welfare of our Women?

Crucial Questions that need serious answers.
People who blame young women who dress or behave in a certain way for getting raped offend my sensibilities. It is akin to blaming a victim for being murdered.
Should we crucify the woman for being at the wrong place at the wrong time?

Women are brought up to believe that male sexuality is an uncontrollable urge and unpredictable phenomena. They are taught by mothers that modesty and caution is your only defence against ending up a statistic.

To view all men as a rapist is a cruel punishment but we fail to punish the guilty when the act has been committed. Our society's patriarchal view of woman as pawns in our life, only distracts the real issue here.
Feminists rue about unequal career opportunities and representation. We celebrate if we get more quota reserved for women. We want our women to be modest but this is exactly what is plaguing our country. We need to sit up and stop ourselves from propagating a culture of tolerance towards crimes against women and being silent about them.

Its not like all our women are portrayed with modesty. We let our movie actresses titillate us with item numbers and clothes that show more than they conceal. Ludicrous stereotyping allow men to relegate women to the shelf, only to be taken for the sake of reproduction and housekeeping.

Sexual Assault is such a violently degrading crime that it repels me to think how the rapist could be aroused by the sight of a victim fearing for her life. It is more about the power trip and the sense of dominance that the act fulfills.

We let our rapists get away with a well greased system that protects and refuses to punish the guilty. Men know this, women use it to 'get back at' men.
Public ignominy for the victim, insensitive police and puzzling laws that allow the guilty get away free and refuses to stop future offenses are not helping our Women.

We need to have a revolutionary change in the way we think. We need to reform the system.
I cheered when I read a recent article citing a need to widen the scope of the law to include gender neutral sexual assault and molestation.
Statistics show that a large portion of the rapes happen at home. By people who the victim is familiar with. Then there are a portion of assaults that happen at dates.
And don't even get me started on marital rapes. I personally know a lady who was raped not only by her husband but by his brothers and cousins repeatedly for an entire year until she mustered enough courage to report this to her parents.

The fear of being ostracized by family and the society stops a lady from reporting the crime.
The braver ones face a lifetime of healing.

Laws that muzzle a woman's right to report crimes against her and the subsequent trauma and humiliation that she goes through while the law takes it's course deters future victims from reporting the crime.
Ironically, laws that are supposed to support and strengthen the poor and the weak who are victimized and exploited end up punishing them.

It's almost like the system is mocking at the victim who had the courage to report the crime, and laughing at the audacity to bring the guilty to book. How dare you?!
We need tougher laws that will warn future perpetrators and greater resolve to enforce our laws.

But as long as we have leaders that fear loss of control, we won't see changes.
As long as we have men who are paranoid about women who will control them, things won't change.
As long as we have gender insensitive laws that treat women as second rate citizens, our courts will be filled with rapists who (may) get tried and acquitted.
And in the time that it took me to write this post, 4 rapes were reported but given the statistics, none will get justice.
But if you ask me, then I would say, Castrate the Bastards.


Saturday, March 20, 2010

*Creative Visualization

We all love those disclaimers, don't we? I sure do. 
Tucked away into the tiniest corner of that advt that promotes recklessness, ravishing beauty, flawlessly strong hair and healthy food, you will find the words *Creative Visualization.

I love advertisements!
They are entertaining. I am perhaps one of those few alive that love watching an TV advt with rapt attention. My acquaintances are amused to see me watch commercials with the attentiveness of a Market Analyst.

To all the rest, a commercial break is a time to take a leak, set the table, do your dishes, take out the trash and all those things you could finish in a couple of minutes. But to me, its more than just a 'comfort break'.
I love these commercials because they keep getting creative. To think of how creative some anonymous, hugely talented yet under-paid, over-worked artists worked to create a 10 second 'movie' that should salivate you so much that you make a mental note in your 'Things to Buy' list to buy their product/service.

There are the good ones and there are ones that I actually change channels or mute as soon as they start.
When did dusky/tanned skin go out of fashion? 
Living through a movie with the dozens of commercials that promise you to win your husbands back and banish blemishes and spots is the visual equivalent of  passing through a public urinal in India. You know its going to hit you no matter what. 
Our fetish with having a pale skin is so powerful that corporations and the Adman, abuse their creative licenses when it comes to commercials marketing Whitening products. 
Want to get fair, or "white in 7 days' or in time to win a movie award, well look no further, get that over priced, small sized pack.
Or is your husband or that random Security guy/Artist not paying you any attention, well, you must not have used that 'Whitening cream that gives you the glow in your face'. Ahh!! Now that feels good. I got my husband back, got that Security guy to notice me and that Artist drew the color of my skin right and a diamond ring. Nevermind if the Artist didn't get the color of my hair right, I'll just try that hair dye that "covers all my greys"

Which brings me to ask.. 

'Why is all the fuss with covering your greys?'
'Since when did greying become disgraceful?'
Ads that have Aishwarya Rai, one of the most over-paid, excessively hyped and sub par actresses on this planet, deserve a special mention. Did you ever catch Pink Panther 2? She is awful. I would be shell shocked if she ever got another meaty role in an Hollywood movie. 
Bollywood is the only film industry that can stand/sit a disaster like Aishwarya. The only ad that I've ever liked is the one where she pledged to donate her eyes. Hype or not. I liked the sincerity in the ad. But now-a-years, she is a mission to save the world from hair damage. Argh!! And to make matters worse, some of her ads have the worst synced voice-overs.

Now, if Aishwarya was not powerful enough to rid the world of its greying sisters, then we have that upset sister complaining to her 'didi', that 'Rohan' (who we can safely assume is her Boyfriend) is going to dump her. Concerned 'didi' gets her the 'answer' to all her problems. Not only did the flirtatious behan get Rohan back, she got an entire army of men to call her!! 
'Mental note to myself: Never date a girl who thinks with her hair'

Which reminds me of a lady who I worked with. She used to straighten her hair and splurge on the most expensive hair treatments. The result, she lost all her hair in under a decade. While most of the women might not be alive to face the ignominy of seeing their bald scalp, is it too much to expect common sense?
Maybe you are not smart and healthy (enough), but wonder no more. We have almost all known catagories of food products that promise you to keep you healthy enough to run down a thief,  a champion at school (it does not matter if you a college dropout though) and smart, witty and fit. There. All you need is a glass, a bowl or a bottle of our product.

And if you are already having all that, but your IQ matches the number of greys in your hair, then you must get that DTH service, for that is the missing link. 

Our Colonial Obsession is a universal secret. 
Why are we so uncomfortable being dusky or just good in academics or letting your greys stay grey?
I am no expert on any of these products and what they can do to us and our world in the long run, but where does all those empty bottles and packaging go? Its certainly not vanishing off into thin air. They end up in landfills that aren't growing any larger. And I'm pretty sure, those plastics will live longer than any one of us. 

Want skin so smooth that you will never be able to sit cross legged in a mini skirt? 
Get them that cream, Ladies. 
Want the babes?
Get that deo, dude. My fav series of deo ads is the popular brand that have men who have used the deo, netting not one, but tons of women (and men, in rare occasions) to drool over him. Lucky Bastard.

Why?! We even have commercials that want us to live longer. But have you ever noticed how all the old people in them have grey hair and are wrinkled? Interesting! 

We do get to see some true masterpieces, like the 'Jaago Re' campaign, the 'Save the Tiger' campaign, the particular campaign that showed in glaring reality how we discriminate when it comes to social status (I'm referring to the campaign where people respond to a lady who looks well to do when she falls down and how people turn a blind eye when an old man, obviously writhing in pain) and a few more. 

So we have commercials that sell everything that we would ever need in our every waking second. 
But how realistic are they? 
What are they doing to our society and more importantly to our psyche? Commercials that show that you need to live recklessly for that bottle of cola, that you will need to be fair and drop dead gorgeous with absolutely no wrinkle (that you might as well have an expressionless face), that you will need to be pale skinned to be able to win that promotion, that you will need to use that deo to melt the hot chick into your arms, that you will need to exact revenge for not allowing your spouse to watch that serial.. and the list can be endless. 
We, true to our culture love to espouse women centric values, but in 8 out of 10 ads, you see that women are portrayed to be objects that lesser to men. We see women being shown as a being who stays at home, cooks and is otherwise a sati savithri and the men doing things adventurous and living it up.

In 20 years from now, none of us will remember who endorsed what, but what kind of a legacy are we leaving our future generations?
On rare occasions when I watch a VCR Cassette (yeah, I still have a VCR!!) I get to see the ads that were created then. Boy! Were they amateurish? But they still had a lot of sincerity and were not outlandish and garishly stupid.
Over the years, poetic license has been reinvented much like some of the ads that we see.

In a society that promotes consumerism, if only we had a disclaimer that warned us: 'Do not try this at home'
You can catch TV grabs of my favorite (and most hated) commercials here.


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